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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Semen is not good for contacts.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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