Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
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