I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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