Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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