we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
