i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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