i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
In America we eat man semen.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize