Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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