i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
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I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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