whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
