I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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