and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I need water and some morals
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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