living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
