ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
