hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
