no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
