the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Randomize
