i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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