i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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