To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
