I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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