he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
