I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
