i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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