I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
