On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I could make wine with my vomit
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Randomize
