Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize