Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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