what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Randomize
