i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
