I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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