Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
