I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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