He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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