come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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