just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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