she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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