Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
It's rum buckets o'clock
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
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