I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
My pussy is not your playground.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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