i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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