in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
