Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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