It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Randomize
