I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
