My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
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