do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
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