Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
