Michael Bay diarrhea
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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