just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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