I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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